Yr. A, Wk. 15: The Dream of God, Part II

Worship and Check-in As Susan and others found that Verna Dozier often provoked us with false either - or dichotomies (either worship Jesus or follow him, either honor the institution or the people), the theme of the evening seemed to be "two sides of the same coin."

Both - and was the theme of Forward Day by Day's meditation du jour, so Scott asked everyone to describe their week in terms of two opposite words. We heard tearful/happy over West Side Story, productive/unproductive because accomplishing big tasks got in the way of routine work, fright/gusto as family dealt with scary health issues with courage, and slow/quick as time inched along but now seems to have been no time at all.

For worship, Scott whittled the hour-long ceremony of Nine Lessons and Carols down to about ten minutes for five lessons without carols. Happy Advent!

Living Faithfully in Your World:
1st yr: Scott 2nd yr: Marilyn, Pete, Nuno; 3rd yr, Susan; 4th yr, Christine. Mentors: Susan and Scott. Absent: None.

Theological Reflection

The church missed its high calling to be the new thing in the world when it decided to worship Jesus instead of following him (Dozier 74).

Our TR was this provocative statement from Dozier, so it served for both TR and reading discussion.

We used the categories of creation, sin, judgment, and redemption to explore Dozier's thesis.

• Creation – freedom to love or not
• Sin - lacking courage to explain your faith and experience – is it for courage to live? Swallowing the idea that clergy is holier than laity, that "lay ministry" is just a help to institutional ministry.
• Judgment - We'll know something's wrong when the institution is rigid. “We will not live the dream of God until we live like Jesus with our own special talents.”
• Redemption – “good creation, friendly folk, friendly skies” - we all ministering to each other …

We offered what came to mind as we discussed Dozier. She was reassuring in a paragraph about risk (p. 109), writing, "I will live by the best that I can discern today. Tomorrow I may find out I was wrong," but the God we know through Jesus is a God "whose forgiveness goes ahead of me, and whose love sustains me and the whole created world."

Variously, we offered individual positions:

• “The church gathered and the church scattered” – great way of thinking about us.
• Through “arts” or “hospitality” or other making / teaching , there’s a lot that church members can do besides worship and listen – in church, out of church – one continuous ministry.
• Still a working together, even though individuals have different talents.
• Dean Taylor, former interim rector of St. James, often said, "You can’t be a Christian by yourself." What about the desert fathers of the church? Though they lived in isolation, they had an institutional context.

We looked in our tradition for some perspective:

• "Love is in solidarity…" is something Dozier writes. She suggests a kind of rebellion, but notice that Jesus sees himself as fruition of Jewish law, not a rebel.
• Some people think Kingdom of God will happen all at once when Jesus returns; yes, Christ says it’s close at hand, but we have to live into it.
• In our culture, Jesus has been appropriated in so many ways. But, from the tradition, we have a sense of what Jesus would and would not do. When we draw Jesus into our own stories through prayer, is it the Jesus we know through Scripture, or some cultural creation? Would Jesus help Cinderella go to the ball? Everyone snorted at the thought!

We shared insights: Slippery slope, trying to be Jesus in the world can lead to authoritarian... Enjoy the etymological connections of words “Community, communion, compassion” – “just and trust” ... We need the leadership and the institution so that we the people can work with others, for others (example of laity who helped me to recognize what I can do) ... Yes, There is tension between individuals and institutions, but remember that institutions are made up of individuals, and individuals in history have risen to "give decadent institutions a kick in the butt” ... Dozier is trying to give some sense of agency back to the individual lay person: we all have a job to do in ministry ... Dozier's strong statement that we were invited by our Creator to be co-workers in realizing God's dream, and we have taken refuge in the Church.

When Scott read aloud Dozier's last two paragraphs and the final sentence, there was agreement: “That’s our collect, amen!” Hearing Dozier’s call to action at the end, we pondered our responses to two questions: What ministry do you imagine for yourself? How could the church be of service to YOU in this?

• help people who think “I’m not creative, I’m not talented” to start thinking of their own lives with artists’ eyes.
• to provide a type of caregiver support group – “caregiver” broadly defined (illness, parenting, eldercare) and it takes “me” out of the equation, and helping the caregiver to REALLY see the person they’re caring for. Church? Bible study can help, but a group with activities that everyone does together is also important. (Art, music, poetry, conversation…)
• to create a program that might be called "The Inspired Retired" for retirees to find new ways to become engaged with (1) themselves and (2) others
• to fulfill the 12th step, i.e., to work with others struggling with substance abuse.
• to make a deliberate effort to engage with people as equals -- especially strangers we encounter, in public, maybe at the drive thru window -– a ministry one conversation at a time. Church could be a place that welcomes people in this way.
• to pay attention to students who need advising to get through myriad hoops and obstacles during this particularly difficult time.

For Next Meeting, January 4 We read the essay for week 16 in the RRG. Susan and I both find that the latter part of the essay, beginning with "Prayer as Spiritual Action" (p. 94), is the heart of the essay. The earlier parts that lay groundwork for it are also good, but may make more sense if you read them last. Pete will bring worship and a question. Scott will supply a source for theological reflection.

Yr. A, Wk. 14: The Dream of God, Part I

Worship and Check-in Susan led worship from the Northumbria Community website. We shared how the past week went, a mix of celebrations and sorrows. We'll be remembering in our prayers Christine's sister, Marilyn's healing, and Nuno's cat Falcon.

Discussion of the Readings We discussed what struck us most in Dozier's first three chapters, and then considered the questions posed in the RRG for this section. Dozier got some pushback in favor of Constantine and the institution of the church, though we all could see the truths in her ideas. Susan suggested that Dozier is making her point with an either/or proposition, when the truth is more of a both/and.

We bought into Dozier's emphasis on the mission of the laity, the "ministry" in EfM. We shared some strong examples from personal experiences with "ministers" of the Church who were not necessarily ordained, and with activities of our own that we can see now as a kind of ministry.

We appreciated Dozier's reminders that the Bible is not a book by God but a library of writings caused by encounters with God. Christine admitted that she herself processes history, poetry, letters and stories all differently -- so Dozier's reminder is helpful to her.

What is the Good of the Church? EfM sent out this link to a video series of discussions that might provide different perspectives on Dozier's doubts that worshiping Jesus in church is the same thing as following Jesus.

Living Faithfully in Your World:
1st yr: Scott 2nd yr: Marilyn, Pete, Nuno; 3rd yr, Susan; 4th yr, Christine. Mentors: Susan and Scott. Absent: None.

Theological Reflection Pete shared this photo from the Depression, one in a series by Dorothea Lang. After sharing our reactions to different aspects of the photo, we decided to set aside our thoughts about the techniques and intentions of the photographer to focus just on the world of the people in the photo.

Their world, we said, was harsh, day-to-day, unjust, exposed. Noting that each figure is clutching another, we imagined that forgetting each other or letting go would be a kind of sin. When we asked ourselves about "redemption" in the world of the picture, we found a softness in the family group, and Christine pointed out the care that obviously went into crocheting the baby's little booties.

We instantly associated this picture with the Holy Family, refugees from harsh conditions. Nuno also remembered the widow who had just enough flour and oil left to feed her son one last meal. But she serves Elijah, and the story has a happy ending. We thought of other prophets who spoke out against the rich and powerful on behalf of the poor and the "strangers." Dozier's thumbnail sketch of Luke's gospel emphasizes Jesus's ministry to the poor and outcast, and she relates love and justice.

There was a thread of judgement in our positions on this photo: what did they do to get into this predicament? What might they have done differently? Alternatively, we heard the position that the family you were born into can limit your choices.

For personal buy-in from the "action" source, Nuno shared some family history and also told us about an encounter he had with a homeless man who surprisingly turned out to be a tourist on a "walkabout," exploring the world.

We came back more than once to the way Jesus sent his disciples out into the world in pairs with no supplies, not even a change of clothes. They were dependent on each other and on the hospitality of strangers the way the figures in the photo are presumed to be.

We thought we might begin our collect with the story of the disciples' mission. As Dozier would point out, we are those disciples, or should be. We thought that we should be praying for understanding and empathy when we see others, compassion, strength, and courage. Nuno volunteered to collect the strands of our discussion(s) into a single prayer.

Collect
Lord Jesus Christ, you send us into this world not with material goods but rather filled with trust, clothed with love, and blanketed in your mercy. Help us to have understanding, empathy, compassion, strength, and courage to share of your bountiful gifts with all those who are in need, knowing that all that we have comes from your divine providence. Amen

We ended with a blessing and Marilyn's reading of the collect she wrote after last week's TR (which will be printed on that blogpost).

For Next WeekWe read the rest of Dozier. The TR will be drawn from the RRG. Scott will lead worship.

Yr. A, Wk. 13: John's Gospel and a Light that can Hurt

Worship and Check-in Marilyn led worship with prayers she chose from different sources. She asked us about the pies we enjoyed with Thanksgiving dinner.

Discussion of the Readings The Y2 crowd met in a breakout room and brought back some points they talked about. John's Gospel begins before the birth. The word "paraclete" gave them pause, and they discussed how the Spirit was with Christ all along, yet came to us after the ascension. John's feels like the most "spiritual" Gospel, yet seems to have a lot of firsthand knowledge of the stories. There's a note of universal salvation here, but also portions that could be used by anti-Semites (though we didn't read it that way).

Living Faithfully in Your World:
1st yr: Scott 2nd yr: Marilyn, Pete, Nuno; 3rd yr, Susan; 4th yr, Christine. Mentors: Susan and Scott. Absent: Christine.

Theological Reflection Susan brought us Emily Dickinson's poem that begins "There's a certain slant of light." [Photo: ext. St. James Church. Scott.] Our focus went to the idea of light that hurts. The opposite thought emerged, too, that darkness can be healing. We also had some personal anecdotes about being able to see a dim glow in deep darkness.

Naturally, we found a lot of light/dark imagery in Scripture.

These insights and positions emerged:

• Twin nature of light - pain of exposure, security and warmth
• “Light within creates light without”
• With light I can see ... light exposes “warts and all”
• light/darkness compared to knowledge / ignorance – John about ignoring the truth
• “With light, the truth is laid bare, and truth is good, but truth can be harsh”
• Seeing in the dark, seeing with eyes closed (“own grey”) – we are not able to perceive dark except in contrast with light -- “The Darkness is not Darkness to You O lord…” (It is not truly darkness to any of us.)
• Barbara Brown Taylor about going in caves and mountains – other senses accommodate – spiritual "Learning to Walk in the Dark."
• Pete’s moonless nights on beach / the phosphorous from ocean; experience of that green light
• Swimming – we all were light to each other

Marilyn volunteered to collect the strands of our reflection into a prayer:

CollectDear loving and ever-living God, we feel the warmth of your light that shines so brightly on one and all, a beacon of clarity and truth: may the light of your love guide our wavering steps through earthly trials and times of darkness; may that love light penetrate our being, and fill us fully, enlivening our hearts, so that we may be fully present, fully loving, and faithfully serving you as best we know how. In Jesus's name we pray. Amen.

For Next WeekSusan leads worship. Pete brings a source for the TR.

Yr. A, Wk. 12: "The Triumph of Faith," a Tapestry

Worship and Check-in Christine led worship with an evening service from the BCP. Inspired by Y4 readings, she asked us where we might visit if we could travel in time. We imagined visiting relatives early in the last century... going back to teach a lesson to our younger selves... seeing the original cast of Stephen Sondheim's musical FOLLIES. Then there was this: "Now is good."

Discussion of the Readings In a breakout room, Yr 2 discussed the readings in Luke and Powell. Luke's emphasis on our responsibility for the poor stood out, with the idea that salvation is not just about life after death, but here and now. The style of Luke is so "smooth-flowing, like a script," and artful: Powell points out that it begins and ends at the temple, it opens with a kind of "overture" and rounds out every big action with a song. There are a lot of commands to listen and hear, which we can take to heart. Finally, Nuno observed that Luke's narrative has nothing negative to say about doctors, but he's hard on lawyers.

Christine discussed Y4 with Susan and Scott. Ford's chapter 9 is about how we know what we know, and how we know what we believe. Like Luke, Ford also tells us listen with the understanding that, just as our experiences have shaped the way we think, others' points-of-view shape how they think. Susan said that Ford, in general, is "poking holes in the idea of one objective view." Christine was inspired by Ford's idea that acquiring knowledge takes trust as well as time. We realized that Christine's occupation is "framing" things, and we discussed parallels to what theologians do.

Scott reported from the Y1 readings that he understands Yee's approach better this time. The essays are looking for positive "ways in" to Biblical texts to see what God offers there to people who are ignored or scorned by those texts. The latest essay highlighted the "radical" care for the poor in Deuteronomy, and, in Numbers, the words of the rebel Karah to Moses and Aaron, which sound very modern, Protestant, and little-d democratic: "All the congregation are holy, every one of them, and the Lord is among them. So why do you exalt yourselves?"

Living Faithfully in Your World:
1st yr: Scott 2nd yr: Marilyn, Pete, Nuno; 3rd yr, Susan; 4th yr, Christine. Mentors: Susan and Scott. Absent: None.

Theological Reflection [Nuno emailed us this note with attachments] So last month my family and I traveled to Asheville, NC. I had never been. We visited an American castle, the Biltmore Estate. It was impressive. They had a designated room outside the library called the tapestry room. There they displayed three huge tapestries that are from a series of seven called The Triumph of the Seven Virtues. These were seen in opposition to the seven deadly sins. These were created in Brussels in the 1520s. Few have survived. They are massive so it is hard to find a high quality image. The center panel is The Triumph of Faith. I would like this to be our focus. The full image is cropped and hard to see so I've included some detail shots also. You will recognize some of the elements. Not pictured is the banner at the top of the tapestry that in Latin says, "The holy Faith trusts in the divine Word and honors God with all the respect due Him". Somebody let me know if you can't see the images. Thank you.

We were all struck by the tapestry's grand scale, animals representing the Gospels, and the collage-like effect of melding of past and present, far and near. We noticed that there was a lot of aggression and violence around the periphery of the tapestry before our discussion focused on the still center where Faith is personified. We derived a sense that she offers wholeness, saw the huge wooden cross with its visible nail holes as a sign of what sin has wrought, and saw redemption in the way she seems to be offering us, the viewers, the church, the sacraments, and sacrifice, too. "She embraces all of it," we said. Some of us felt like we were "in" the picture only insofar as the figure is addressing us on the outside who are looking in.

As we explored the image more, we found connections to us, to our culture, and to our positions. We saw this inviting, calm figure in dialogue with some ways that "faith" appears in our culture as a kind of cocky self-confidence or a list of intellectual beliefs. Nuno helpfully pointed out that St. Helena is often depicted carrying the wood of the cross, too, and that she was the mother of Constantine, so there might be implied a theme of "the woman behind the man."

We expressed these overall insights / reactions / positions:

• in the Trinity, eucharist, and church itself, we are all "enveloped" by faith
• community is central to faith
• faith grounds you, gives you security
• faith is about trust more than assent to intellectual propositions
• it's a unifying allegory of faith and scripture for a pre-literate society

When we thought about how the memory of this image might be applied to our lives, suggestions surrounded the communal element of faith -- Trinity, Church. At the conclusion of typing up these notes, Scott made this attempt to collect all the strands in one prayer:

Collect for FaithTriune God, you embrace us through church, cross, and sacraments: may a sense of community in space and time sustain our faith at the still center of all the interweaving threads of our lives so that we may draw others in to the ever-changing tapestry that is your church. Through Father, Son, and Holy Spirit we pray. Amen.

For the Tuesday following Thanksgiving: While we pray for each other, we'll especially remember Christine's sister in chemotherapy and Nuno's father-in-law in the hospital. Marilyn will lead worship for week 13, and Susan will bring a source for theological reflection.

Liturgy for Worship Adapted from Poetry by Mary Oliver

Every week, our Education for Ministry seminar begins class with a worship service. We are encouraged to be creative, so long as our liturgy hits the same marks as ones authorized in our prayer book.

I'd been reading about Mary Oliver's collection Devotions and made the jump to creating a liturgy that would be a sort of collage of pieces from her work. I read her collection Thirst when it was new during the weekend of my first vestry retreat, and blogged about it. That post A Doorway into Thanks is a perrennial hit, read now by thousands.

A Short Worship Service Adapted from Poet Mary Oliver's Thirst (2006)

The ellipsis [...] marks my omissions from Oliver's text; two asterisks ** mark space breaks inserted for the purpose of group reading. Other spaces are Mary Oliver's own.

Opening from "Six Recognitions of the Lord" p. 26
I know a lot of fancy words.
I tear them from my heart and my tongue.
Then I pray.

Confession ibid
Lord God, mercy is in your hands, pour
me a little. And tenderness too. My
need is great. Beauty walks so freely
and with such gentleness. Impatience puts
a halter on my face and I run away over
the green fields wanting your voice, your
tenderness, but having to do with only
the sweet grasses of the fields against
my body. When I first found you I was
filled with light, now the darkness grows
and it is filled with crooked things, bitter
and weak, each one bearing my name.

A Song of Praise from "Messenger" p.1 (adapted for responsive reading - response after each asterisk)
My work is loving the world. Here the sunflowers, there the hummingbird -- equal seekers of sweetness,*
Here the quickening yeast; there the blue plums. Here the clam deep in the speckled mud.

Are my boots old? Is my coat torn? Am I no longer young, and still not half-perfect?*
Let me keep my mind on what matters, which is my work,

which is mostly standing still and learning to be astonished,[...]*
which is gratitude, to be given a mind and a heart and these body-clothes,

a mouth with which to give shouts of joy to the moth and the wren, to the sleepy dug-up clam,*
telling them all, over and over, how it is that we live forever.

Homily "The Summer Day" from The House of Light (1992)
Who made the world?
Who made the swan, and the black bear?
Who made the grasshopper?
This grasshopper, I mean—
the one who has flung herself out of the grass,
the one who is eating sugar out of my hand,
who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down—
who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.
Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face.
Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.**

I don't know exactly what a prayer is.
I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down
into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,
how to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,
which is what I have been doing all day.**

Tell me, what else should I have done?
Doesn't everything die at last, and too soon?
Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?

Prayers from "Praying" p. 37
It doesn't have to be
the blue iris, it could be
weeds in a vacant lot, or a few
small stones; just
pay attention, then patch

a few words together and don't try
to make them elaborate, this isn't
a contest but the doorway

into thanks, and a silence in which
another voice may speak.

Silence may follow. Worshipers are encouraged to speak their own petitions.

We sum up all our petitions in the words that our Lord Jesus Christ taught us, saying...
The Lord's Prayer

Collect to be selected from the Episcopal Book of Common Prayer

Closing "Thirst" p. 69
Another morning and I wake with thirst
for the goodness I do not have. I walk
out to the pond and all the way God has
given us such beautiful lessons. Oh Lord,
I was never a quick scholar but sulked
and hunched over my books past the
hour and the bell; grant me, in your
mercy, a little more time. Love for the
earth and love for you are having such a
long conversation in my heart. Who
knows what will finally happen or
where I will be sent, yet already I have
given a great many things away, expect-
ing to be told to pack nothing, except the
prayers which, with this thirst, I am
slowly learning.

Yr. A, Wk. 11: Eyes Open

Worship and Check-in For worship, Scott adapted poetry by Mary Oliver, mostly from her collection Thirst. At Susan's suggestion, the whole piece is published here on our class blog. For Oliver, prayer is a "doorway into thanks." A major theme in her poems is how opening our eyes to God's natural creation can be a way of loving God.

Three weeks late (sorry, Pete!), we shared stories of our spiritual heroes. We used the words "hospitality" and "welcoming" in a lot of our descriptions of people who impacted us, and at least a couple of us stressed how our spiritual heroes had their spiritual influence without talking directly about religion. Susan expressed gratitude for the many who composed our prayer book and songs in our hymnal, stretching back centuries. Pete mentioned the priest who impressed him early on with a sense of purpose to life. In Nuno's early life, clergy were white men of a higher socio-economic status than their congregations, so he was impacted by his encounter with a dynamic young black preacher who didn't have those advantages.

Living Faithfully in Your World:
1st yr: Scott 2nd yr: Marilyn, Pete, Nuno; 3rd yr, Susan; 4th yr, Christine. Mentors: Susan and Scott. Absent: None.

Discussion of the Readings We went into two breakout rooms, one for Year 2 and the other for discussion of Year 4. We came back to share what emerged from those discussions. Year 2 appreciated how Mark "humanizes" the disciples in their progression from clueless to the church pioneers they would become. God didn't choose them on their merits. The open-ended conclusion of the Gospel is striking, leaving us to be part of what happens next. Marilyn found personal resonance in Mark's passages about divorce.

Speaking about her reading in Ford, Christine loved the idea of "the company words keep" in a sentence, a chapter, a book, their time and their culture. Pete asked if it's all about practical applications of what you read; Christine answered that it had to do with layers of translation that should make a reader humble about thinking they have the only valid read on a text.

Theological Reflection

Christine shared this image by John August Swanson (1/11/38-9/23/21) for our theological reflection.

Our discussion narrowed down to our reactions to the eyes in the painting. We each identified with a different character in the image, with strong feelings for what their eyes and gestures said about them. After we had considered the world of the picture and related it to several pieces of Scripture and our own experiences, we listed these insights and applications:

• We lose our vision if the light isn’t coming into the eyes
• Eyes, insight, perspective
• Where you are changes what you see
• Pinhole camera – so much can come through that tiny opening, but only if you stand very still
• Eyes of Jesus fixed beyond the room, beyond the people, above their heads, (on eternity?)
• The way you see can change everything – not just what you see!
• Sight can be recovered.
• “My perspective can totally change my day – I need to balance my perspective – temper things” Distorted vision – like words and culture –
• Keep looking, look to God
• Seeing is not a power that we have, we depend on outside light for vision
• Internal light – my conscience; External light is public

Scott finished the collect with substantial help from St. Paul (2 Cor 4.6):

Collect for Open EyesCreator of the stars at night, your light entering our eyes can guide our paths, even in darkness, if we stand still and wait: enlarge our imaginations to see others' perspectives, and cause your light to shine within us to give the light of revelation -- the revelation of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ. Amen.

For Next Week We remember each other in our prayers, and let's give thanks for the great improvement in Nuno's father-in-law. Christine will bring us worship. Nuno will provide a source for our TR. We plan to take off the week of Thanksgiving.

Yr. A, Wk. 10: Barefoot on Holy Ground

Worship and Check-in For worship, Scott adapted prayers for All Soul's Day from the church in New Zealand. For a check in, Scott once again forgot to follow-up with Pete's question about spiritual heroes. We'll try again in Wk.11!

Discussion of the Readings We worked with the challenge from the RRG to reflect our readings through a single word or theme. Susan chose "family feud" as it describes the intense rivalry among Jews, Christians, and Moslems who all trace their faiths back to Abraham. Christine chose Ford's words "intensification" and "journey," as his chapter surveys the different ways that the Church has journeyed through the centuries using a range of metaphors to "intensify" our understanding of salvation. Pete chose Powell's word "invitation" because it reminds Pete that, whatever questions the Gospel of Matthew may raise about sources and historical accuracy, the book invites the reader to believe and follow. "I'm in deeper than before," Pete said, "understanding Jesus as a person." After reading the gospel all the way through, Nuno appreciated the "structure" in a new way, seeing levels of instruction that Jesus brought his disciples through.

Nuno put in a special plug for Powell's graph of features distinctive to Matthew.

Living Faithfully in Your World:
1st yr: Scott 2nd yr: Marilyn, Pete, Nuno; 3rd yr, Susan; 4th yr, Christine. Mentors: Susan and Scott. Absent: Marilyn came late; Susan disappeared when a system update hijacked her laptop.

Theological Reflection Our TR came from the RRG, the encounter with the burning bush that draws Moses into his life's work. We focused on the moment when Moses removed his sandals to stand on holy ground. We imagined some of the sensation of warm sand between the toes. We recalled moments of intimacy in the Gospel when the woman anointed Jesus's feet and when Jesus washed his disciples' feet. We came to see the removal of shoes as a sign of receptivity. We composed this collect, polished later by Scott: Collect for Encountering the Holy Holy and omnipresent God, our Lord said to stand aside in a private place to pray, and Moses took his sandals off to stand before the burning bush: remind us as we walk our daily rounds to set our shoes aside and make ourselves present to you so that your spirit can enter and make us burn with the light of the father’s love, through the grace of your son our savior Jesus Christ. Amen.

For Next Week Christine will bring a source for the TR. Scott will do worship AND Pete's check-in question about our spiritual heroes.

We are praying for each other, remembering especially Christine's sister, Nuno's father-in-law and daughter.

Yr. A, wk. 9: Happy Halloween

Here's a photo that Christine shared:

We did a TR on Halloween a few years ago (11/2017) and came up with these ideas and a good collect:

Scott presented the Celtic origin of "All Hallow's Eve" as background to a TR on "Halloween."  We used the wide-angle method, accumulating memories and associations with the holiday.  We were drawn to a theme of communities drawn together -- as we all had witnessed neighborhoods bonding for the occasion.  Looking back into tradition, we found several parallels to the Exodus event, including a grim one in the blood-strewn doorways and Death's going door-to-door.  We collected our thoughts in one prayer:

Collect for Halloween

Creator of all that is, seen and unseen, You sent Your Holy Spirit to enlighten and protect us: help us find community with our neighbors and the souls of ages past, that we may overcome fear and differences to extend ourselves to the strangers among us.  Amen.

Yr. A, Wk. 8 + 9: Jesus and the Vortex

Worship and Check-in Pete led worship. We'll use his check-in question next week (because Scott moved right on past it!).

Living Faithfully in Your World:
1st yr: Scott 2nd yr: Marilyn, Pete, Nuno; 3rd yr, Susan; 4th yr, Christine. Mentors: Susan and Scott. Absent: None.

Discussion of the Readings Everyone contributed, and Scott kept score by initials:

N– Jesus maybe celibate for religious reasons? is that a poor assumption? “Who is the real Jesus?” Earthly and exalted – and four same yet different depictions of him in Gospels. Q would be an anthology of sayings of Jesus. I’m fascinated by the Q source. Would it change everything? Mt and Lk seem to be quoting a source that we don’t have. The Diatessaron – an ancient amalgamation of the gospels, is how we probably think of them now – but the distinctions are important.
M - Thinking of the INTENTIONS of the writers is a new idea. “Earthly and Eternal” - Does Jesus have more than one idea of “kingdom of God?”
C – hermeneutical gap – how can we today relate to a 1st century man? Bottom line: well, how can we relate to our neighbor? Different languages and societies find different ways of embracing Jesus in personal life – Ex. through artwork – compare the Chinese way of drawing him.
S – In final chapters of Exodus, we have a sort of prayer book with lots of official instructions. The artists who made the ark of the covenant are held up for admiration and skill in honoring God through their work – arts and faith idea.

Theological Reflection Scott shared the first story to feature the word d---head. When we'd all bought into the thoughts and feelings surrounding the event, we focused on the isolation of the person and the danger of going forward, backward, or even of staying where they are. Our metaphor was "the vortex," supposing a raft or ice floe and Arctic water.

Redemption, we thought, might be pushing through to get out of the vortex. Then Nuno had the striking idea of the Eternal Jesus at the moment that he is about to push into the world through human birth.

We used "chat" to write lines of prayer: Discerning when to stay in the center and when to step into the fray
Help us meet chaos and confrontation with love and trust.
Lord, help me be intentional in my actions..
Dear God, Please give me the strength to move when I need to and to be still in times of trouble, to help me see a clear and peaceful path.
Maybe sometimes like Daoism— acting without acting, acting like water

Christine, seeing our prayers, put together a collect that seems to touch on all our ideas:

Collect for a VortexHeavenly Father, as you guided Moses in the parting of the Red Sea amid chaos and fear, help us to remain steadfast in our faith in enduring hardship and confusion when we are pulled in several directions.

For Next Week We do the readings assigned in Wk 10. Our TR will be the one suggested at the end of that chapter. Worship is being provided by Scott. We will use Pete's question about your spiritual hero, since someone forgot to remind Scott not to skip over that part last week.

Yr. A, Wk. 7: We Chew Some Hard Words

Worship and Check-in Nuno led us in worship from St. Augustine's Prayer Book. His check-in question brought a lot of joyful responses: "What's your favorite hymn or spiritual song?" Our official EfM play list would include: "O Memorial wondrous" (Adore Te), "Be Thou My Vision," "I Sing a Song for the Saints of God," "Come Thou Font of Ev'ry Blessing,""Go Tell it on the Mountain,""This Little Light of Mine,""Amazing Grace," "Were You There?", "All That We Have and All that We offer...". (We need a recording of Marilyn singing that last one!)

Living Faithfully in Your World:
1st yr: Scott 2nd yr: Marilyn, Pete, Nuno; 3rd yr, Susan; 4th yr, Christine. Mentors: Susan and Scott. Absent: None.

Discussion of the Readings To the usual alphabet of Amazed, Bothered, Confused, and Delighted, we added

E-What echoes in your life?
F-Does anything ring as a false teaching or false truth? What frustrated you?
G-Where did you see generosity or God in your reading or reflections?
H-What seems to be “heavy?

Our starting point was about how the words of scripture are to be "chewed and digested." We had trouble digesting the words exigesis and hermeneutics, settling on the idea that one is about digging into the origins of the text, and the other is about what the words were/are intended to mean. Scott enjoyed learning that "Bush" (as in "the burning...") is a pun on the name "Sinai," another place where Moses encountered "I am Who I am." We were also daunted by the sheer number of different critical approaches to ancient texts, though we appreciated how a combination of these can help us to get at different sides to a text: they are "different keys to different doors."

Nuno put in a good word for the Apocrypha, since Powell didn't. The variety of kinds of writers in the NT amazed us. The layers of meanings of the word "evil" kind of overwhelmed Ford's chapter on the subject. MacDonough's chapter on the empire was definitely overwhelming, even for someone familiar with it.

Scott also took this unattributed note: “Catholic and Apostolic” explanation down through the generations – love the connection through the network in time – Like dogs being under the same blanket and all hearing the same things in the earth and neighborhood!

Theological Reflection For the final installment of our spiritual autobiographies, we all shared a story of "grace." First, we had to separate the word "blessing" (a joyful gift) from the word "grace," a gift from God of insight, faith, power, or freedom (e.g., from guilt or fear).

Nuno's comment summarized what we heard: "Grace can redeem suffering."

For Next Week We read the first pages of chapter 8 in the RRG about the "why" of theological reflection, and then do the assigned readings for chapter 9.

Pete brings worship and a check-in question. Scott brings a source for theological reflection.

Yr. A, Wk. 6: "It's Complicated!"

Worship and Check-in Marilyn led us in worship, which included an original poem at the conclusion to celebrate her friend Suzanne's crossing over. We answered the question, "What's something new in your life?"

Living Faithfully in Your World:
1st yr: Scott 2nd yr: Marilyn, Pete, Nuno; 3rd yr, Susan; 4th yr, Christine. Mentors: Susan and Scott. Absent: None.

Discussion of the Readings Christine spoke for us all when she said, "It's complicated!" We made several observations, including these: The Pax Romana looks like a good thing, but was experienced as oppression. Judah's behavior towards Tamar looked honorable to people of his time, but he confessed that she was in the right. "Cynicism" looks like a bad approach to the world, but the ancient Cynics held an appealing philosophy (and we won't mention Pythagoreas's beans). We do the best we can as Christians, as Americans, as parents perhaps, but we have to suit our choices to the environment we're in.

We also picked up on "the apocalyptic mentality" of "us versus them" in many of the readings, as with the Gnostics and their supposed secret knowledge regarding body, soul, and the reality of Jesus.

Theological Reflection We shared stories of experiencing God's presence from the chosen periods of our lives. For what has been; for what is; for what is to come -- Thanks be to God!

For Next Week We'll do readings for chapter 7. The final installment in this year's spiritual autobiography will be an experience of "grace." Nuno will lead worship.

Scott will poll everyone on four questions from EfM Central regarding preferences in the way EfM distributes the books. Would you prefer a lower enrollment fee and then buy the books yourselves? Would you prefer all books online? There are a couple of other related questions. Don't let me forget!

Yr. A, Wk. 5: Zeal for the Lord and Violence

Worship and Check-in Pete led worship from the Northumbrian community's materials. He asked us to tell about our "heart homes." Answers included the sumer home; no longer a place but wherever the family is together (a new realization!); old home in Minnesota despite big changes there. Several of us talked about scents: the pleasant salty scent of the sea, but also pleasant memories brought back by the unpleasant chemical scents of places we worked or lived. [IMAGE: Susan's unfinished watercolor depicting salt marshes.]

Discussion of the Readings "Love God with all your might; love your neighbors as yourselves" was our starting point. How can that be reconciled with so many places in the Bible where zeal for the Lord justifies horrific violence? We also found in scripture a third way, picked up from Jesus by Gandhi, Howard Thurman (see Scott's reflection from a previous EfM year) and Martin Luther King, Jr., to "turn the other cheek" and shame the aggressor, or wear him out. Collins told the story of a Jew's forgiveness for a Nazi: "hating, you become hate."

Another theme had to do with building community despite tensions, through shared experience. We share stories, actions, and active trust in the Spirit to guide our processes. Christine, responding to Ford's overview of theology, found resonance in her work with the elderly that experience can be shared in non-verbal ways through art and personal engagement.

Living Faithfully in Your World:
1st yr: Scott 2nd yr: Marilyn, Pete, Nuno; 3rd yr, Susan; 4th yr, Christine. Mentors: Susan and Scott. Absent: None.

Theological Reflection We told how our faith was challenged during the periods of our lives that we've been remembering. These were very challenging stories that we will keep to ourselves in our hearts.

For Next Week

We'll read the RRG ch. 6, noting also the portion at the end addressed to "All Years." Look for ways that your assigned readings Amaze, Bother, Confuse, and / or Delight you. (Scott has 22 other letters, if you need some!) 

We will share a story of feeling the presence of God from the time period we've chosen.

Marilyn will prepare worship.

Yr. A, Wk. 4: Context Matters

Worship and Check-in Christine led worship this week with a service from Scotland. She drew on this year's garden metaphor to ask us about plant life that has drawn our notice. For some of us, our favorite plant is anything low-maintenance. Others spoke of gratitude for "Mother's daisies," getting to know trees by working with them, azaleas and other perennials for coming back even though we haven't tended them.

Living Faithfully in Your World:
1st yr: Scott 2nd yr: Marilyn, Pete, Nuno; 3rd yr, Susan; 4th yr, Christine. Mentors: Susan and Scott. Absent: None.

Discussion of the Readings

We took a minute to look at the RRG's list of habits that get in the way of listening and that kill discussion, p. 38.

Our discussion started with a lesson learned again and again from Collins's book on Biblical values, that context matters. That means the context of the time and culture in which a piece of Scripture was written as well as the literal context. Pete gets the impression that Collins offers many different answers to questions of value in order to make us uncomfortable about any definitive statement. From Collins we learn why it can be overreaching to state "the Bible says" just one thing about an issue.

Another theme emerged, how God can be a unifying force while tension remains--whether that's tribal rivalries or doctrines.

The RRG had asked us to think of differences among words that are often used interchangeably, faith, trust, and confidence. That came up when Scott told how he was learning to trust in the process of scholarship that Yee describes, as critique follows critique, finding holes in each theory or interpretation. It looks like squabbling, but it's widening areas of agreement and opening new areas of inquiry. Christine (I think!) said that there are "checks and balances" in the scholarly process, so the nit-picking and contradictions are not a bad thing.

Nuno posed a question about the faith of Jesus: If he knew who he was in the same way that we know a fact, can he be truly said to have demonstrated faith? We pondered that awhile. Pete pointed out that Jesus's faith seems to come under stress when he feels God has abandoned him on the cross. Marilyn spoke of faith as "knowing that she knows." Scott was reminded of another EfM reading from Diana Butler Bass in which she looked to the German root of "belief" to find belieben, "beloving." Faith may not be a thing you hold to be true, but action performed with trust in your relationship to God.

Theological Reflection We shared our second round of "worlds" or "contexts" from our spiritual autobiographies.

For Next Week Pete will bring worship.

We'll do the readings for week 5. Our spiritual autobiographies move on to the question, "How was your faith challenged?"

Special concerns as we keep each other in our prayers:

• Christine and her friend Laura, mourning the death of Laura's mother
• Pete's neighbors, especially the wife
• Nuno's family while he's away
• We remember Cynthia, passed away at 78

Yr. A, Wk. 3: Shelter and Impact, Past and Present

Worship and Check-in Susan prepared a service from the Northumbria Community. We checked in with a question from the psalm: had we experienced the sheltering of God's wings -- or needed to? Needs were great this week, with friends and loved ones struck by illness, death, quarantine. Some good news, mixed -- it's great to quit smoking, but the disruption to routine is an unintended side effect.

We took a moment to review advice that everyone contributed last week for this year's metaphor of "turning the soil" in our "world." Christine said that the blooms in her photo are a mix of plants of different ages, an observation that turned up again when we discussed this week's readings.

Discussion of the Readings Christine led off our discussion with an observation from her 4th year reading about "connectedness between history/tradition/past and the present." Each year connected to that:

• Right to Life – abortion, death penalty – there’s not one singular message in Scripture, and inferences can go different ways… associations with laws and sorcery: when we try to decide how to live now – it’s complicated!
• Collins on where we’ve been, where we’re going, important even when communities disagree on specifics – creation, revelation – “talk about extremes to get to the middle”
• We have to think of the rule as it was then, not imposing our views on them. Example of slavery.
• The double love commandment: God, neighbor. This will be Collins’ key to determine what Biblical values are.
  We went deeper:
• Collins about Biblical values: times, traditions, norms of distant past: how do they translate to now?
• Greek and Roman world – their values are context for the development of Christianity, including the words we use – author laying groundwork for what’s to come
• Theological literacy gives us a sense of belonging – we are a member of the house of God – a society going back – past and present – (cloud of witnesses, all the saints)
• Goes with the overall theme of the year: contexts matter; there are layers; there’s a mix of “worlds”
• Collins – creation is not just about beginnings, but about CONTINGENCY and DEPENDING on the higher power

Scott observed that those hydrangeas from our "garden" metaphor last week are an image of this week's lesson, as Christine had pointed out that the different colors and blooms represent plants from different years present in her photograph.

We liked the way that our outloud discussion made connections that we could see when our contributions were notated on a grid. We will continue this way at least until we decide otherwise.

Living Faithfully in Your World:
1st yr: Scott 2nd yr: Marilyn, Pete, Nuno; 3rd yr, Susan; 4th yr, Christine. Mentors: Susan and Scott. Absent: None.

Theological Reflection We each used our allotted time to share a story from a certain five-to-ten year period of our lives about some context or "world" when something impacted our faith. These are confidential, so we're keeping any notes to ourselves.

For Next Week Christine will lead worship.

Books will arrive at Scott's patio on Friday 9/24.

We'll read chapter 4 in the Reading and Reflection Guide (RRG), (PDF) and do the readings assigned.

1. Yee, preface and introduction
2. Collins 3,4,5 &6
3. MacCullough 2 ("Israel")
4. Ford, ch. 2

We're asked to think about how faith, trust, and confidence are interrelated in our past stories, our present life, and in the readings for this week.

We continue the spiritual autobiography with the 2nd story. Tell about how your faith...

• 2nd story: ... sustained you in one of your contexts in the period on which you are focusing.

  Coming up next:

• 3rd story: ... was challenged in one of your contexts in the period on which you are focusing.
• 4th story: ... revealed an experience of the presence of God in one of your contexts in the period on which you are focusing.
• 5th story: ... revealed grace in one of your contexts in the period on which your are focusing.

Yr. A, Wk. 2: Tending the Garden

For worship, we read the liturgy that Scott composed for 2:30 am, Prayer for a Restless Night. The check-in question was about how we're sleeping these days.

We took turns answering questions about the reading that appealed to us in a list provided by Scott. We were drawn to the questions about listening, whether to take notes when we listen, and about different applications to the analogy of water's being shaped by the cup: We speak differently in different "worlds"; do we experience God differently in different contexts?

Living Faithfully in Your World:
Year Two: Marilyn, Pete, Nuno; Year Four, Christine. Mentors: Susan and Scott. Absent: None.

We used "chat" to gather class norms in terms of this year's "world" metaphor, thinking of "earth" and "turning soil" in a garden. [Photo from Christine; gracias.]

• Let the sunshine in
• Joe Dirt: “Life’s a garden, man. Can you dig it?”
• Don't criticize other peoples' gardens
• Plant a seed and watch it grow. Love Blooms
• Gardening and our spiritual lives require daily rituals
• Be prepared to dig deep.
• Let others tell you about their plants and garden design.
• Plant multiple seeds so they will vary.
• Nurture the tender little ones and they will grow strong
• Dig below the surface to dig up the truth
• Tend to the garden weekly; don't neglect what we're doing.
• Share your tools in your toolbox
• Don't over-prune the discussion. Let it keep going if it's going somewhere.
• Sometimes things will grow all on their own given time
• Many hands make light work: share thoughts on the blog, and respond to others' thoughts.
• Open-ended questions are like water and fertilizer; leading questions are like choking weeds. Don't choke the dialogue.
• Some insects are helpful and beautiful; don't reject something just because it's alien.
• All things in the garden aim towards Heaven. Who can say what is prettier, a rose or a daisy? Each is its own creation.

Next Week Susan will prepare worship.

We hope to have books before next class. Pete is ready to copy the first two chapters of Collins's Values book for fellow 2nd years; Scott may be able to do the same for Christine for Ford, ch. 1. Christine: One of your readings is an essay by Ballard that's printed in last year's RRG, pp. 192-200.

Preparation for the Spiritual Autobiography: For your eyes only, look back over standout people, places, events, books, and then select a 5-10 year period of focus. Think of one of the different "worlds" you lived in during that time, and prepare to tell us how your faith was impacted by that world. (In later weeks, we'll explore other worlds from that time in our lives and tell how faith was sustained or challenged, how we felt God's presence, and how we felt grace.)

P.S. Here's a link to an article about the Hamilton bassist whom Scott met on the Silver Comet Bike Trail.

Yr. A, Wk. 1: Catching Up

Scott led worship with the Lord's Prayer and a General Thanksgiving from p. 836.

To check in, we used the 3-2-1 method: 3 places we spent time this summer; 2 ways we felt blessed; 1 blessing we saw bestowed on another. We also sent a photo from a category of choice.

About the reading, we volunteered what we understand differently now than we did when we read the same chapter last year. The role of the mentors and the importance of the TRs came up. Marilyn learned by doing, and we came to the conclusion that EfM is training us to see the eternal in every day things.

Living Faithfully in Your World:
Year Two: Marilyn, Pete, Nuno; Year Four, Christine. Mentors: Susan and Scott. Absent: Christine.

For next week, we'll read chapter 2 in the Reading and Reflection Guide (RRG), p.18-32 pages (PDF).

For a closing prayer, we used the "chat" function to list our concerns, then recited the responsive prayer on p. 122 and the collect on p. 124.

Yr. D, Wk. 36: Closure

We met face to face for the first time, gathering under the porte-cauchere of the St. James courtyard. Susan offered everyone their choice of water-color-and-salt cover for a collection of the year's original collects, 4th year first. Scott sang "O Gracious Light" and continued with the rest of the early evening devotion from the BCP. Students offered a reading of their favorite collects, interrupted briefly by the St. James train. Scott and Susan, having presented our graduates with diplomas during the Sunday service, gave Mariel and Gene bound color copies of the blog posts from their four years in EfM.

Yr. D theme: Living into the Journey with God Class: Marilyn, Nuno, first year; Christine, third year; Mariel, Gene, fourth year; Scott and Susan, co - mentors. Absent: None.

Afterward, Mariel and Gene treated everyone to dinner at Wei on the Loop. We left in rain, to love and serve the Lord.

Yr. D, Wk. 35: Looking Back

Before Susan led worship, we took a look back at images that Scott selected from the trove that we all contributed to last week's TR challenge, i.e., to find wordless expressions of prayers to God. We saw "circle of life," connection and reaching to God -- sometimes through others -- in the images of outstretched hands. "It's all God's handy - work!"

After prayers, Susan asked us to look back on the week and tell what was wonderful. Singing the Sanctus in a full church for the first time in over a year brought tears to my eyes... Happy birthday Sunday... playing "Jesus Loves Me" with bell-ringers at church... the Pentecost service and picnic... working with volunteers to make Italian food for shut-ins at the nursing home... another "circle of life" experience.

Yr. D theme: Living into the Journey with God Class: Marilyn, Nuno, first year; Christine, third year; Mariel, Gene, fourth year; Scott and Susan, co - mentors. Absent: None.

We discussed the reflection guide's question, "How do this week's readings speak to the theme of maturing in one's journey with God?" Marilyn volunteered that line from the Paul, "When I was a child, I thought like a child; but now...." Christine pounced on the idea that the world itself is maturing, as described in the massive church history book -- an echo of MLK's favorite quotation about the arc of history bending towards justice over a long time. Gene and Mariel both were struck by the anecdote of the staggeringly poor woman with little son who set aside 1/12 of their day's earnings "for the poor."

The scope of our reflection broadened to the whole year. Mariel and Gene both cited Rabbi Heschel's Sabbath book as life-changing and observed that his name comes up a lot in My Neighbor's Faith. About reading scripture, Mariel commented, "You're never sated" with Old and New Testaments. Christine got a sense of how the world and Christianity grew up together -- and Mariel plugged a shorter book by Robert Wilkin about the Church's first 1000 years. Nuno felt that the first year readings "catch people where they are," and he appreciated illumination of women's roles in the Old Testament and apocryphal wisdom literature, how norms were broken.

We watched a video of testimonials by the Tuesday morning EfM group and recorded our own reflections on what we expected from EfM, and what we got from it.

We decided to meet in person on Tuesday, 6:30 PM June 8, in the small parking lot of St. James. After prayers there, we will walk or drive to WR Social House (formerly "Willie Rae's") on the Square for dinner.

After a virtual toast, Mariel shared a video she created, "Remembering the Ride."

Yr. D, Wk.34: Beyond Words

Mariel led the service for early evening. She asked us about any "rest" we had in the past week. Nuno was able to stop and enjoy the children. Scott spoke of his Friday evening ritual walk with Susan to the Square to get dinner. Mariel told of looking down from her window on birds attracted to her feeder, and how her eyes are drawn by their flight up into the trees. Susan had finished grading. Christine told of sitting in the car after a visit to the nursing home, always taking a few minutes to watch nature and, sometimes, happy kids arriving on the school bus. Gene said that this group grounds him.

We discussed wisdom literature from the Apocrypha, and also how our church relates to the Apocryphal books. Christine's reading led to some discussion of the genocide of Armenian Christians and some family ties to that time and region. Mariel told us that her favorite story in this batch of chapters in My Neighbor's Faith concerned a quote from Merton about how the deepest level of communication is beyond words in communion (with God, with each other).

Yr. D theme: Living into the Journey with God Class: Marilyn, Nuno, first year; Christine, third year; Mariel, Gene, fourth year; Scott and Susan, co - mentors. Absent: Marilyn.

Theological Reflection (TR)

"Beyond Words" became the theme of the evening, further explored through an anecdote from Bishop Curry's recent book Love is the Way that Gene brought to us for a TR. Curry recalls the glimpse of a tattooed prison camp number on an elderly Jewish woman's arm as a searing moment of understanding that cut through all the words in his head.

We found many, many instances of meaningful, emotional gestures and images in our Tradition and in our Experience. Mariel coined a phrase "wordless Logos" to describe a wordless expression of deep meaning in a gesture or image. Instead of writing a prayer with words, we agreed to contribute images that express what we might pray for. Here's our wordless prayer:

Yr. D, Wk.33: Eternity in a Moment

Christine led us in worship. We shared highlights of the last week: a memorable memorial service; the gift of new shoes from a cantankerous co-worker and the restoration of a favorite pair; a great Mother's Day.

Reading about the Maccabees - also Bel and the Dragon - was "interesting." Nuno felt that the textbook's approach to Daniel is unnecessarily skeptical. Marilyn was excited by the dream imagery and pleased by Daniel's essential humility. Mariel was struck by expressions of "otherworldly" experiences in My Neighbor's Faith. She cited especially the journal of a teenaged Sikh girl who enters a church ready to fight but feels that the "battlefield melts into a sanctuary." Christine had to read about colonization and brutality in Christ's name for a chapter about making the world Protestant; good intentions and good forces get lost, she said, when individuals make poor moral choices for personal gain.

Yr. D theme: Living into the Journey with God Class: Marilyn, Nuno, first year; Christine, third year; Mariel, Gene, fourth year; Scott and Susan, co - mentors. Absent: Gene.

Theological Reflection (TR) After coincidental encounters with pieces about Mr. and Mrs. Charles Lindbergh, Marilyn offered poetic lines and verse by Anne Morrow Lindbergh. We were drawn to a line about a "golden eternity of here and now." We pictured a moment of time being expanded into eternity. This dovetailed nicely with Mariel's earlier comment about otherworldly experiences. All five of us being artists (and Gene, absent, "an artist in his hiking") could identify with being so wrapped up in a creative work that we lose all sense of time.

We explored the image. When you’re in this moment, you lose track of time, the need for water, food... there's Joy, bliss, a carefree quality... internal space... the process becomes as important as the end... like floating on an air mattress in a pool – time goes away – waves lapping – sun is warm ...unselfconscious. What goes wrong? What’s broken? You get so into something that you have to tear yourself away to take care of other things. ...Life-denying is a danger, a kind of nihilism (Nietzche)... Times when I go deep, I become absent to loved ones.

[Note from Scott: This is the theme of the musical Sunday in the Park with George by James Lapine and Stephen Sondheim. See Photo of Jake Gyllenhaal on Broadway as George Seurat, lost in his painting. That show reshaped Scott's imagination. See Sunday, Art and Forever at his personal blog.]

Coming at the image from sources of Tradition, Personal Experience, and the Culture, we shot out many directions: Hebrews in the wilderness look back on the past that they remember as ideal... Jesus in prayer, Jesus on the mountain, Transfiguration ... Mystics in our tradition and others: "Om"... centering prayer... Dorothy Gale's idealizing Kansas as she explores Oz... Jew in My Neighbor's Faith experiences Buddhist Moksha, awareness, liberation from attachment, “we are dreams talking to dreams”...Layers of work to make the art (Christin'es story of preparing a certain frame)... “La vida es [dream]”... High school art teacher world becoming a dream, dream a reality... COVID in a blur of days - ongoing.

Asked to consider insights and positions that arise from considering this image, we found these:

• Eternal present may mean “unanchored” - Whether it’s your choice is important.
• This experience can be rejuvenating for you and those around you.
• Christine thought of the skylift at an amusement park: we’re suspended in air awhile, but safe because the wheels touch the tower
• Mariel: If we have the will to enjoy these moments of eternity, they can relieve our anxiety of future or the past… You can be too absorbed. Cf. The Transfiguration: Tempting to want to stay there… and Jesus could have… but he came back to us.
• “It’s not the pep rally, it’s the game!”

We offered lines of prayer:

Dear God, Thank you for the wonderful experiences you give us.
Let us continue to be blessed by the wonders of your creation moment by moment throughout our days.
Dawn and dusk, so brief, so beautiful. Let the new day begin.
Let us be continually reminded of your Spirit and Love.

Lord, abide with me in my hurry ups and my settling downs; through valleys and mountains, be my companion on the trail.
Today I will stop and listen for your voice.
Not being dragged back or pulled forward, Lord, let me rest in you.

Creator of all things, we long to be drawn into the process of creation, to be absorbed in process and layers of expression.
Help us to share our gifts and experience.
Lord, let me get lost in you.
When we get lost in prayer, may we find You.
Moment by moment, day by day, show us your love and then put us back in the game.

Yr. D, Wk.32: Transformational Relations, Generational Torches

Nuno led us in worship from the BCP. For on-boarding, he wondered what was the last movie we'd seen in an actual theatre? "Too long ago to remember," said Marilyn, but she later recalled a movie with a God-like character who, for love of a character, sometimes altered His plans. (This came up again in our discussion.) Christine saw James Bond in a dinner-theatre place. Nuno and Gene saw episodes of the Star Wars epic; Mariel saw Mary Poppins Returns. Susan and Scott saw David Copperfield in a multiplex mostly pandemic-empty. [See a TR from February 2017 about James Bond and A Dickens Thanksgiving, Scott's blog about David Copperfield.]

Yr. D theme: Living into the Journey with God Class: Marilyn, Nuno, first year; Christine, third year; Mariel, Gene, fourth year; Scott and Susan, co - mentors. Absent: None.

After reviewing the comments posted below about the readings, Scott posed a question from the RRG about how the readings speak to our own senses of vocation / self / purpose. Answers to that question emerged only gradually, as we shared other impressions.

Tongue-in-cheek, Gene summed up chapters of Our Neighbor's Faith as, "Be kind to Mormons." But he admitted that his own prejudices had crumbled when he encountered real-life Mormons. The story of a Canadian Aborigine who prayed as a girl to be white "so I can go to Heaven" moved Mariel in a chapter called "The Prayer that God Could Not Answer." Mariel, too, was reminded of her father, his life-long antipathy towards organized religion, the encounter with a friendly Lutheran pastor that brought her father into the church, and what her late father left for her to see in his sick-room Bible. Scott brought in a theme from 1 Peter, how the gentiles who have now encountered Christ now join "God's chosen people" in exile, yearning for the "promised land."

Christine observed how women rose to new prominence in Church history in the 17th century, partly because of visions of the Virgin Mary. Nuno remarked on Esther and Ruth, women who rose to prominence while still operating within the roles that society had defined for them. Mariel pointed out that one represents the lowest of low classes (Ruth, a Moabite widow) and the other represents royalty. To the RRG's question about what you get when you read these stories as fiction, then as literal history, Mariel observed that every fiction worth reading is based on real human experience. "And those stories keep happening," Susan added.

At this point, Scott observed that we had answered the question about vocation after all, as each of the stories we'd read, and the personal stories that they'd brought to mind, involved a personal encounter that changed someone's sense of who they were and where they were going. "Like what happens in a TR," Mariel quipped.

Theological Reflection (TR) Mariel brought us a page from Barack Obama's memoir Promised Land. At a time when the presidential candidate was under fire for his association with a firebrand pastor, an elder spoke to him in Biblical terms: Obama was of the "Joshua generation" that would pick up from the work of the "Moses generation" of civil rights activists.

"It's a TR already!" said Gene. We remarked on how the passage frames history in mythical terms -- making it univeral. The images of crossing a finishing line and passing the baton brought to mind Chariots of Fire and also the cermonial relay running of the Olympic torch every four years. In the tradition, Mariel pointed out, we have so many exhortations to pass the story along, God's salvation of Israel, Jesus' salvation of us all.

We related these ideas in our own lives. Christine has personal memories of Kent State and how change in 1971 actively involved everyone, not just a few leaders. Nuno feels like his generation of "stay-at-home dads" faces a lot of opposition with messages about "wrong decisions." Gene observed that women struggled to gain a foothold in law schools when he was a law student, but few people know that prominent law schools now are predominately female: "Sometimes, when these [generational] struggles are won, hardly anyone notices." Scott identified with the idea of letting a younger generation of teachers take over from him. Susan picked up on a line from Obama's mentor, that every generation is limited by what it knows. Near the end of a very full life, Mariel's grandmother recited Hamlet to her and sighed, "I should've stayed in teaching," which Mariel took as encouragement to go on with her career: "Courage rushes through you."

Gene concluded that generational change is why TR's are so important. Looking at what's happened in the past few years, Gene said, "Who knows what the world will be like years from now? We can't anticipate. We need to learn the skills that we can carry forward."

In the "chat," we offered these lines of prayer:

Lord, help us to recognize the gifts of generations before us.
May we be encouraged by their faith and love.
The same flame burns today as it did for Moses and Joshua;
may we be as ready to receive Your word as to pass it forward,
and may we hear your Word to guide and strengthen us on our journey.
We pray for the wisdom to know when to pick up the torch, where to take it - and the wisdom to know when to pass it on.
We pray for each generation to have strength and courage.

Lord, Help me to see that what I do in my time has a place in all time.
Keep me focused, Lord, on the end game.
Send your light before me to show me the way.
Bless all the unknown foot soldiers who fight for justice and peace in your Name.
LOVE LIVES.

Yr. D, Wk.30-31: Pearls of Wisdom and Perils on the Sea

Yr. D, Wk.30-31: Marilyn's worship and on-boarding question had to do with Spring and renewal. We shared how we look ahead to a new normal, travel to see family, planting, and more bird activity -- including recently some young daredevil birds that jumped out of the nest.

We compared notes on the RRG's article, the noosphere ("Nunosphere?!").

Most of us were reading works that qualify as "wisdom" literature: Job, Proverbs, Ecclesiastes, and James. We speculated why Wisdom is personified as female in many cultures -- perhaps because men realize wisdom isn't in them. Gene and Mariel found "little gems" in My Neighbor's Faith.

Jon Meacham, Historian and Episcopalian, came up in the discussion because of diversity, civility among people of different backgrounds, and his book on the last words of Jesus.

Because Christine was away, it fell to Susan to set us straight on the Enlightenment and religion: religion fell into the trap of trying to beat science on scientists' terms.

Yr. D theme: Living into the Journey with God Class: Marilyn, Nuno, first year; Christine, third year; Mariel, Gene, fourth year; Scott and Susan, co - mentors. Absent: Christine.

Theological Reflection (TR) Gene brought us a poem published decades ago by his grandfather William Stanley Hoole. The poet portrayed acquaintances under altered names. The portrait of "George Waterman" is short enough to quote in its entirety:

Hear me O Lord, I pray,
An old and wearied man
Unused to prayer:
I seek no miracle,
No stilling of the sea
Or saving draughts of fishes.
A candle in a rushing wind am I,
Alone and at the end--
Draw nigh, O Lord, and be my friend.

After some discussion of being alone at the end, as in hospice, we found our focus and an image from Susan's observation that the references to the sea, fishing, wind, and the name "Waterman" all suggest a lone fisherman in danger for his life -- whether the danger is immediate or existential didn't matter. We remembered Mariel's favorite painting by Winslow Homer.

Exploring the image or idea, we imagined choppy waters, empty nets and wind blowing. We found "incomprehensible peace" in the awareness that he’s asking for what he already has. "Experiencing God at the very end is like a draining out of fear and anxiety." Quiet – muting of the storm – like when you tune out the kids and the television. We sensed a long loneliness : he seems outside of community. He's not asking for a savior, just a friend.

Exploring the sources, we found many relationships. Tradition: God is in the wind (Job)... Hymns "Abide with me... when comes the evening tide" and "Those in peril on the sea"... numerous Gospel stories of boats, calming water, filling nets, walking on water, offering living water, baptism. Action included Scott's vivid vicarious memory of a classmate's sailboat accident, how she felt peace and acceptance of drowning just as hands pulled her out of the water. We traded stories of sleep as a journey on a raft (with animals, children). Culture included these thoughts: Mariel quoted Elizabeth I, “One savior, one faith, all rest is trifles….” Blowing out candles on a birthday cake symbolize the death of another year. Nuno thought of Elton John / Bernie Taupin and their song "Candle in the Wind."

Insights and positions included these: We picture ourselves dying old, but death is always there. In a way every night is like this when we fall asleep… Disciples in the boat --> “DISCIPLINE.” The overriding message of Ecclesiastes: transitory lives…

At the end, we offered lines of prayer on the "chat" board:

Awake in the early morning hours, O Lord, I feel my bed as a raft afloat on swirling anxieties and feelings of inadequacy.
Where have all my friends gone? Are they with you, O Lord? Will I see them again?
My emptiness makes me receptive to the Lord.
Lord, at the hour of my death may I not find that I have never known you.
Save me, Lord, from waves of fear. Let me know that you are always here,
That day and night, light and dark, I am always with you, my Lord
The deep is so deep, the night is so long, yet I believe "joy cometh in the morning."
Dear Lord, Please let us feel the gentle wind of reassurance, a sign of your friendship.
I pray that when the end comes, I am seeking Christ as a friend and not being fearful of the unknown.
Thank you for letting my light shine as many days as you did. I am forever grateful.

Yr. D, Wk.28-29: Hospitable Planet, Hospitable Nest

[Photo: Marilyn found the nest of a cardinal couple sandwiched between the screen and wreath on her front door.]

Christine provided worship with prayers and meditations focused on the natural world and its beauty. She asked us about our individual efforts to protect the earth. Recycling, foregoing plastic, eschewing meat, and considering electric vehicles all seemed fine but piecemeal. "We are all caught in this trap" of having to use what we want to reject. May I suggest that this is an example of how Sin is sytemic?

After the comments below about Hospitable Planet by Jurovics, we had a few more things to say. About what we can do, some of us were irked by the promotion of specific groups in the middle section of the book. Mariel recalled a woman angry over flooding in Tulsa whose persistence brought change after years of haranguing public officials. Nuno faulted the analogy between the crusaders for Civil Rights and the promoters of nuclear power. Christine appreciated "the big picture," understanding that we cannot rely on actions of public leaders.

Yr. D theme: Living into the Journey with God Class: Marilyn, Nuno, first year; Christine, third year; Mariel, Gene, fourth year; Scott and Susan, co - mentors. Absent: None.

Theological Reflection (TR) Susan had us reflect on the poem provided for this week in the Reading and Reflection Guide (RRG), "God's Grandeur" by Gerard Manley Hopkins. Mariel joined Susan and Scott in leading different movements of reflection.

Mariel led the group to focus on one aspect of the poem. We found most energy around Hopkins' comparison of the Spirit to a mother bird warming the babies in her nest.

Scott led the exploration of that world with our imaginations and all our senses. Marilyn shared with us her observations of baby cardinals nestled in the wreath on her screen door (see photo). We imagined ourselves in the world of the nest: We didn’t build our home; our mouths open, we're needy, vulnerable, waiting, noisy! We liked the thought of the spirit mother always moving, bringing us nourishment from a world that baby birds can’t imagine. Marilyn attested to the fact that the birds are always growing (even in their sleep).

With Susan, we explored what the other sources tell us about the bird image. Tradition “O Jerusalem… I've wanted to gather you like a mother hen…” ; hide me under the shadow of your wings… in Communion, we’re all gathered there for food, and the priest puts it in your mouth… Isaiah – soar on wings like eagles… God knows if even a sparrow falls to earth… Lilies and birds "neither toil nor spin" yet God dresses them finely. Culture Hitchcock’s Birds – Mother nature getting even with us … Birdman… Icarus … Batman saving the world… Silent Spring.

When we hit the Action source, discussion really took off in unexpected ways. Feeding birds in the park, good relations with birds in public spaces.. beautiful yellow bird across my path… birds very close at botanical gardens… in MO, bald eagles wintered, and you could look DOWN on the soaring eagles, you felt like you were with them… .. hummingbirds – may be pretty but they can be nasty… sea gulls steal pizza… in Australia, a kookaburra stole food FROM NUNO’S MOUTH! (and look out for its spear!)

Reflecting, we found interconnections: I appreciate seeing the birds, their territoriality, their displays… just being close to them... After Juravicz, I feel that birds may be pushing back on us for invading their territory... Holy Spirit as birds... first sound in the morning is the birds, then owls at evening. “Canary in the coal mine” – our effects on the natural world, warning of a dangerous situation – out of balance…. Animals understand God’s covenant -with them, like the birds in their nests… (says Juravics).

We concluded our discussion writing lines of prayer:

Thank God for the glory of birds and the music they make marking dawn and dusk.
Thank you God for sheltering us under your wing.
Your care for our earthly nest lifts our spirits like doves in flight;
Thank God that we are more than sparrows.
Let us tend to nature as God tends to us and the rest of nature -- we are part of nature too, even when we see ourselves apart from it.
We may leave our Mother's home, but never her heart.
Thank you for warmth and protection.

Christine's closing prayer also fit the theme, as one of us had observed how the encircling of a nest is an image of its protective, nurturing, family-creating function:

Circle us, Lord. Keep protection near and danger afar.
Circle us, Lord. Keep light near and darkness afar.
Circle us, Lord. Keep peace within; keep evil out.
~from Celtic Daily Prayer